Ugly

I’ve been called beautiful.
I’ve been called ugly.
What do I remember most?
Being asked if I’m lovely?
If I know how different I am.
If I’m good enough.
If I’m smart enough.
Constantly being questioned if society will accept me. (my mind)

My religion is ‘oppressive.’
My culture is beautiful.
My career choices only set for a man but never told how amazing I could be. Only negative things. Only deadly words never sweet sincerity.
Always being asked but not appreciated.

Yet, What do I remember most? Being ripped apart into tiny minuscule shreds by your terms.
Yes, YOUR words.
Having a conversation and realizing how different I am.
How ‘special’ I am because I wouldn’t conform to your ways. Since when did standing out become ‘ugly’? Since when did taking a stand become ‘exotic’?

My mind seems to be a magnet
to negativity and a repeller of positivity.
The good isn’t enough to outweigh the bad
because the bad brings hate. Hate brings change
so change brings understanding which resulted in
appreciation that became respect and finally LOVE.
I’ve been called beautiful but I’ve also been called ugly. I can only seem to remember the negative because it shaped me. It made me feel unstoppable.
It took me a year to finally say Thank you!

Thank YOU for springing the negative because look at how amazing it made me.
I’m loving who I’m becoming.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s